Re: Feedback on 9.0 release text? Please?

On 11 July 2010 22:05, Rob Napier <rob(at)doitonce(dot)net(dot)au> wrote:
> Josh
>
> I made two changes as outlined below. I have no other issues with it. I
> think it reads well.
>
> On 11/7/10 4:11 AM, "Josh Berkus" <josh(at)agliodbs(dot)com> wrote:
>
>> We use the term "update release" to refer to patches and security fixes,
>> so I don't think we want to use "update" here.
>
> The repetition is not THAT serious so let's leave the first para as it is.
>
>>
>>> PostgreSQL 9.0 also includes more than a dozen other major improvements
>>> enhancing every aspect of <<<building/HUH?>>> database applications,
>>> including <<</:>>> 64-bit Windows support, conditional and per-column
>>> triggers, deferrable unique constraints, and high-performance event
>>> messaging. For a complete list of features, see our release information
>>> page (link).
>>
>> Hmmm.  I suppose "building" isn't strictly necessary, and if
>> unnecessary, should be cut.
>
> Does this read better?
>
> PostgreSQL 9.0 includes more than a dozen other major improvements that will
> enhance every aspect of database application design and performance,
> including: 64-bit Windows support, conditional and per-column triggers,
> deferrable unique constraints, and high-performance event messaging.  For a
> complete list of new features, see our release information page (link).
>
>>> Thanks to the contributions of developers and companies around the
>>> world, such as NTT Open Source, EnterpriseDB, 2ndQuadrant, Red Hat and
>>> many others, development and <<<adoption momentum/HUH?>>> is greater
>>> than ever.
>>
>> Yeah, I had trouble with the phrasing there and could use some help.
>> What I really wanted to say is that our project momentum, both for
>> developing features and for user adoption, is higher/faster than ever.
>> Thoughts?
>>
>> Also, if anyone knows a big-name company who contributed a major feature
>> to 9.0 that I'm not thinking of, please mention them now.
>
> I like Evan’s suggestion for this para:
>
> Thanks to the contributions of developers and companies around the world,
> such as NTT Open Source, EnterpriseDB, 2ndQuadrant, Red Hat and many others,
> user adoption and development momentum is greater than ever.
>
> Regards
>
> Rob Napier
>
> homepage:     www.oncetechnologies.com
>
>

So is this now ready to go for today's update?

Thom