Re: Help me improve the 9.1 release draft

On Sat, Aug 13, 2011 at 7:00 PM, Joshua Berkus <josh(at)agliodbs(dot)com> wrote:
> PG fans,
>
> http://wiki.postgresql.org/wiki/91releasedraft
>
> Clearly this needs some work, and wordsmithing.  I do want to keep the focus of the release on the features, because we have killer features this release.  Also the theme of "Features, Innovation, Extensibility".

I'm no marketing guy, so take this with a large grain of salt or
ignore entirely. I think the first paragraph could be improved to
emphasize, as you say, the "killer features". This bit:

| This latest release of the leading open source database contains more
| new features than any previous version, each of which are compelling
| reasons to adopt PostgreSQL

seems too much like hand-wavy-marketing-speak. I think it'd be better
if it were more like the first paragraph of the 9.0 release notes[1].
Maybe something like "This latest release contains many significant
new features aimed at enhancing reliability, performance, and SQL
Standard compliance. Users are particularly excited about synchronous
replication and [other cool features]."

And then maybe this sentence could be axed, or perhaps moved to the
end; it doesn't seem important enough to emphasize in the first
paragraph:

| In PostgreSQL's 25th year of database development, our community
| continues to introduce new innovations with every annual release.

Josh

--
[1] http://www.postgresql.org/about/press/presskit90.html.en